Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
