While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Operation Purity has been aborted
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
