i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize