it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
