i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
