She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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