Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
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Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
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I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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