do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize