so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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