I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
