I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity