Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Randomize
