do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
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