so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
