I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
