Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Randomize
