Someone shit on the floor
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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