There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
