i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
