In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
