From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
