Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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