Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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