There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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