this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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