i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
