I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
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