Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
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