gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
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