this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
