those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize