absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
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I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
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Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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