Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
