fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
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