I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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