this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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