Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
whose ass print is on the piano?
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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