im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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