I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
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