Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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