we have pet lesbian snakes
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
