dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
