If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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