i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
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