I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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