I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
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I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
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I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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