I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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