That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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