wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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