Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
