at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did angry sex become our thing?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
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