I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Randomize
