the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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